2020 – Public Maskerbation

(Ignore May 1, 2017 publish date – this was published on April 24, 2020)


Way back on March 10 – a whole six weeks ago – I posted a picture on a local site I moderate of the first person I saw outside my living room window wearing an anti-virus mask (http://www.hackensacknow.org/index.php/topic,3922.0.html). I mentioned that I hoped it wouldn’t become commonplace, but that I had a feeling it would.

Unfortunately-prescient little buzzard, aren’t I?

The thread was titled, “Masked citizens – the Coronavirus” and it’s become the repository for everything local that’s Covid-related, including local notices, cartoons and the “Coronavirus on Main St, Anytown, USA” post on this blog on March 30.

When it came time for me get a mask, I immediately went to Old Reliable – eBay – and researched hundreds of offerings. Most were from China, but buying from the country that sent us the problem was the last thing I wanted to do. After a while, I found one that seemed OK from a seller in LA for $9.99 with free shipping.

I bought it on April 3 and it was to arrive by April 13.

It didn’t.

It still hasn’t.

A good friend had mentioned to me that she was making masks and hooked me up (Thanks, E!). Meanwhile, I found out that the company WAS from China and had scammed eBay and thousands of unmasked U.S. residents (over 2,000 at last count).

You know how it’s a bad thing when you get a negative feedback on eBay? I checked this company’s feedback page and, as of this morning, they’ve received 278 negative feedbacks in the last month! And all with the same complaint: no delivery, phony USPS tracking numbers that all lead to info that the packages were last scanned on April 8 and never made it out of……………..Dayton, Ohio?

I’ll get my money back, but – jeez – how slimy can a company get? And shame on eBay for also getting scammed.

So with that problem “solved” and my face covered, I suddenly realized – out of nowhere – that I had a mask back in the 80s that would be perfect: it fit my face from the nose down and it also fit my profession and my personality.

The only pictures I have of it (and of me wearing it) were published in the 1986 post here, which I began by writing about a legendary guy (and friend) in the music business  and then going right into the mask: https://iaintjustmusic.bobleafe.com/?p=726 – trust me……….you don’t wanna miss these pix.

I knew I never threw it out, but hadn’t seen it in ages, so I spent yesterday afternoon hunting it down………….and found it!……………but it’s not quite in the same condition:


I guess if you were stuffed in a drawer or closet for the last 34 years, you’d be a dehydrated hard lump too.

I’ve searched high and low online for another one…………….nada.

So if you happen to know where one might be for sale or if you have a sure-fire way to re-animate this hard lump back into a soft rubber mask (most of the online suggestions are iffy), please post it in the comments.

Thanks and DO maskerbate safely when you’re out in public.




  1. E April 24, 2020

    Try some olive oil lol

  2. Annemarie April 25, 2020

    E — she’s so great!

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